The Pacific Northwest According to Jeff Foxworthy

This little gem has been making its way around the office. There's more truth here than I care to admit.

The Pacific Northwest According to Jeff Foxworthy

1. You know the state flower (Mildew)

2. You feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash.

3. Use the statement "sun break" and know what it means.

4. You know more than 10 ways to order coffee.

5 You know more people who own boats than air conditioners.

6. You feel overdressed wearing a suit to a nice restaurant.

7. You stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk" Signal.

8. You consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain.

9. You can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best, and Veneto's.

10. You know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon.

11. You know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Issaquah, Oregon,
Yakima and Willamette.

12. You consider swimming an indoor sport.

13. You can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food.

14. In winter, you go to work in the dark and come home in the dark
- while only working eight-hour days.

15. You never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho.

16. You are not fazed by "Today's forecast: showers followed by rain,"
and "Tomorrow's forecast: rain followed by showers."

17. You have no concept of humidity without precipitation

18. You know that Boring is a town in Oregon and not just a state of mind.

19. You can point to at least two volcanoes, even if you cannot see
through the cloud cover.

20. You notice, "The mountain is out" when it is a pretty day and you can actually see it.

21. You put on your shorts when the temperature gets above 50, but
still wear your hiking boots and parka.

22. You switch to your sandals when it gets about 60, but keep the socks on.

23. You have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.

24. You think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists.

25. You buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find the old
ones after such a long time.

26. You measure distance in hours.

27. You often switch from "heat" to "a/c" in the same day.

28. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit under a
raincoat.

29. You know all the important seasons: Almost Winter, Winter,
Still Raining (Spring), Road Construction (Summer), Deer &Elk season
(Fall).

30. You actually understood these jokes and will probably forward them!

OK, well, I blogged about them instead. Save an email. Use RSS.

(I just showed the list to Michelle. There were some of these that were so true that she didn't even realize why they might be funny until she thought about it for a while.)

Thanks to Jon for sendng this to me.

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6 Comments

Felicity Reply

I Hmmm'd at this more than I laughed... sad, I know...
I think #30 should have the word jokes removed, this is my life... I am in the same world as Michelle I guess where that is concerned... and anyone who uses an umbrella for anything other than protection from the harsh rays of the sun is a pansy!!!

sunava Reply

Really well written. It's so true, and I've been here for 7 months only. The umbrella's long gone, and the sunglasses are lost!
:)

sara Reply

so true, all of this could only be funny if you are from the northwest.

carol thomas Reply

I am not a redneck, but loved the Pacific Northwest statements. I saw it yesterday at my medical clinic while they were drawing blood from me. I had to laugh, and went on line to get the rest. As a former Californian and Alaskan dweller, I love the Northwest with all its quirks. Thanks for a good laugh.

Laine Reply

I'm from Oregon and I thought it was so funny!! And so true. I thought everyone measured distance in time...who doesn't? And, who can't tell the difference between Chinese, Japanese and Thai food? It's all SOOO different. Very good though. Very funny.

Snowboard Snoqualmie Reply

I didn't get these at first and i didn't know people aren't like this every where until i took a road trip across the US last summer and realized how quirky i was....I still feal bad about throwing away that newspaper back in florida...*sigh*

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